Hello, I know it has been a while since I have written….. This should probably tell you something!
As I was looking back over the past year and thinking about this next year several thoughts came to my mind but the most important thing I want to share today is a request to all who read this……
Based on what I have (and continue to) learn about myself, I need ACCOUNTABILITY!
As some of you may know this is a “Button” of mine and clearly because it is something I need. While I feel in general I am good about taking personal responsibility for my choices and actions the one thing I seem to fail at is asking for help, asking for and allowing myself to feel support is a constant struggle for me.
I am working on allowing others to do for me as well as asking for that which I need, UGH!
This is hard but what I have learned from my experience of giving and supporting is that those who do not allow me to support them, or those who do not accept accountability from me are not only denying me a gift of giving but also denying us both a chance at a deeper, more real relationship.
When I am allowed to be supportive and encouraging as well as challenging (in the form of loving accountability) I feel honored and more importantly I feel close to the person receiving it, this is a gift to me. So what I realized is by not asking and not allowing other to do this for me I am denying them a gift as well, and I am certainly not one to deny anyone a gift! J It is just hard when that gift comes in the form of “Being there” for me….. (Clearly my issues)
All that being said ………. I am putting myself out there and offering us both a chance at a gift!
I need Accountability. Now this sounds a bit ominous, but it is simple. I realize after not having written the past few months that when I don’t write I am not being as conscientious of my process. This really just a nice way of saying …… when I don’t write I can’t be accountable so I can be in denial (by choice)! I do not want to do that….. I want to be able to own up to my choices, to learn from my choices AND be accountable for my choices! This is where you come in……..
I am at a point in this process where I find it becoming more and more easy to get frustrated and want to throw in the towel. Obviously this is not an option I am willingly going to choose so I am stepping out of my comfort zone and heralding for assistance.
PLEASE ask me when my next blog entry will be coming if you do not see one every few weeks, Please ask me how it is going if you hear nothing about my journey from me or my blog, Please ask questions about things you want to hear about, Please ask questions about my progress, process, thoughts, ideas, ANYTHING. Also Please feel free to suggest topics …. Please share your insights, observations, wisdom. Please share your personal struggles, concerns or issues with the topic of health and well being.
(This is not just about weight!)
So that is it for today…. ACCOUNTABILITY!
I need it, I am asking for it! (What the H*ll am I thinking????) LOL
Thanks in advance for all your support!
Kathryn
P.S. Disclaimer;
PLEASE DO NOT confuse this plea for accountability as not feeling supported. I deeply appreciate and do feel the support! This is specifically in relation to my writing about the process. I have felt support all along but realize for me I am more accountable if I am writing, maybe something about having it down in words works for me? I do know being able to go back and see what I have struggled with, conquered and where I have come from helps me to keep things in perspective which as many of you know I do believe perspective is everything! Thanks again
Hello, I know it has been a while since I have written….. This should probably tell you something!
As I was looking back over the past year and thinking about this next year several thoughts came to my mind but the most important thing I want to share today is a request to all who read this……
Based on what I have (and continue to) learn about myself, I need ACCOUNTABILITY!
As some of you may know this is a “Button” of mine and clearly because it is something I need. While I feel in general I am good about taking personal responsibility for my choices and actions the one thing I seem to fail at is asking for help, asking for and allowing myself to feel support is a constant struggle for me.
I am working on allowing others to do for me as well as asking for that which I need, UGH!
This is hard but what I have learned from my experience of giving and supporting is that those who do not allow me to support them, or those who do not accept accountability from me are not only denying me a gift of giving but also denying us both a chance at a deeper, more real relationship.
When I am allowed to be supportive and encouraging as well as challenging (in the form of loving accountability) I feel honored and more importantly I feel close to the person receiving it, this is a gift to me. So what I realized is by not asking and not allowing other to do this for me I am denying them a gift as well, and I am certainly not one to deny anyone a gift! J It is just hard when that gift comes in the form of “Being there” for me….. (Clearly my issues)
All that being said ………. I am putting myself out there and offering us both a chance at a gift!
I need Accountability. Now this sounds a bit ominous, but it is simple. I realize after not having written the past few months that when I don’t write I am not being as conscientious of my process. This really just a nice way of saying …… when I don’t write I can’t be accountable so I can be in denial (by choice)! I do not want to do that….. I want to be able to own up to my choices, to learn from my choices AND be accountable for my choices! This is where you come in……..
I am at a point in this process where I find it becoming more and more easy to get frustrated and want to throw in the towel. Obviously this is not an option I am willingly going to choose so I am stepping out of my comfort zone and heralding for assistance.
PLEASE ask me when my next blog entry will be coming if you do not see one every few weeks, Please ask me how it is going if you hear nothing about my journey from me or my blog, Please ask questions about things you want to hear about, Please ask questions about my progress, process, thoughts, ideas, ANYTHING. Also Please feel free to suggest topics …. Please share your insights, observations, wisdom. Please share your personal struggles, concerns or issues with the topic of health and well being.
(This is not just about weight!)
So that is it for today…. ACCOUNTABILITY!
I need it, I am asking for it! (What the H*ll am I thinking????) LOL
Thanks in advance for all your support!
Kathryn
P.S. Disclaimer;
PLEASE DO NOT confuse this plea for accountability as not feeling supported. I deeply appreciate and do feel the support! This is specifically in relation to my writing about the process. I have felt support all along but realize for me I am more accountable if I am writing, maybe something about having it down in words works for me? I do know being able to go back and see what I have struggled with, conquered and where I have come from helps me to keep things in perspective which as many of you know I do believe perspective is everything! Thanks again
Hey Kath,
ReplyDeleteGreat idea! We just finished our Junior Theater Festival, 2,200 musical theater kids (mainly middle school)...and a kid asked Disney Theatricals President Tom Schumacher if he had ever been picked on or bullied because he was a boy who did theater.
The question and Tom's answer (which was spot on regarding the fact that bullies never achieve or create, they only obtain power by taking away self confidence and joy from their victims. They are parasites in essence...)
In reading your blog I wonder what it was like for you in middle school...were you bullied...how did you cope...what advice would you offer that bright eyed 12 year old Kathy Mackell who is out there dealing with this issue as we type?
Wow, that is brave! I know what you mean and I have been thinking about you and your blog lately. I guess I should have asked you. Can't wait to read what you have been up to.
ReplyDeleteLovely post to start off the New Year! You are incredibly supportive and easy to talk to; I appreciate you. It's hard for me to talk to people about anything less than positive as I feel that it may be a burden or an annoyance to them. I would guess I'm not alone in that boat of reasoning. So, that was really nice what you said about feeling good when people bring their struggles to your friendly ear.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I think many of us don't ask some questions of our friends because we don't want to interfere, or be nosy. We exist as little islands, afraid to offend. My guess is that those two things, when combined, leave a lot of us not asking & not telling... and therefore not growing.
I love that you have invited your readers to inquire into your life. I look forward to your next blog… and I hope to see it before Valentine’s Day. Deanna.
Hi Kathy
ReplyDeleteI think this is a wonderful idea, I think most of us could be more accountable, I love that you asked for help. I will nudge you when I don't "see" you!! I know I do much better with most things when I write them down, so good that you know what you need.
Robyn - From Lindley Street :-)
Hi - I love your blog - this one really resonates with me, it is so hard to ask for help - but once you do it is so freeing, I haven't seen you in a long time, and I think of you often, I too will nudge you next time I see you and know that you are thought of alot and admired by many for your great accomplishment and in taking on this journey, hope to see you soon, Tracy
ReplyDelete